After years of trying to resist submission to me for fear of becoming so addicted that he would lose his family and destroy his life as he knew it, a once-dedicated minion is now back where he belongs… on his knees at my feet.
This minion, known as krawling, or krawling4Kyaa, was (and still is) a helplessly obsessed little bitch. It may have taken him years to return to me, but just like any other weakling who might try to stay away from their destiny, he has again found himself begging to be mine.
When he asked what he might do to please me upon his rededication to serving me I instructed him to write me an essay on “How you tried to resist and failed.” This is it:
As commanded, Goddess, here is my essay. Thank You for the honor of performing a task for You.
It’s strange how someone who makes his living with words can feel so…inept writing an essay for You. Then again, it is an essay for a Goddess. A nobody, a nothing, is writing for Everything. Not exactly an even playing field.
i remember this feeling from my last spell under Your spell. Or, more accurately, my last explicit and admitted spell, since i never fully woke from it.
Last time around, i got scared. i am a middle-aged man with a family that i love. The power that You have over me–over all loser men–was terrifying…is terrifying. It seems strong enough to blow everything else away. You could snap Your fingers and…anything could happen. The world unfolds under Your will. You can shape us in whatever image pleases You. Or destroy us, if displeased.
i have a career that doesn’t leave me much spare cash, certainly not the amounts i would feel compelled to deliver unto You, certainly not what You deserve.
With You, i felt as if i were standing on the edge of a chasm. i was tempted to fall, i wanted so badly to fall. But my ties to this world, my commitments and responsibilities, were strong.
i stepped back from the edge. i told You i had to do so and You were so generous and kind in Your response. You could have done anything. You could have made me do anything. And You showed mercy.
i quit drinking. i quit smoking. i made a more rigorous commitment to buddhist meditation. i was a good father and husband. i think i still am both.
But You never left my mind. i told myself over and over that i would delete the photos and videos that You bestowed on the members of Your loser’s club. i couldn’t. They were holy artifacts. i buried them in an external hard drive that i, in turn, buried in the back of my closet. But who was i kidding? That hard drive sang to me. I heard Your voice calling, at times soothing, at times mocking. Siren. Goddess. Kyaa. All.
i would periodically dig the artifacts out of hiding. When no one else was home, i would turn on my computer and fall to my knees. i would worship, lost and pathetic, a gibbering fifty-year-old man with his pants around his ankles. i would end up on all fours, whimpering Your name, and some part of me was happy to know that You still had the power, regardless of time or distance, to reduce me to that state.
i could not resist. i can not resist. i started visiting Your sites again…and i was lost. If anything You had only become more beautiful and powerful with time. Even more skilled at what You do. Even more enchanting, hypnotic, imperious…and i was engulfed.
i held out for a while longer, lurking, creeping, twitching and murmuring Your name. But i knew it was only a matter of time before i contacted You again.
i am still terrified. i have some pathetic idea that i can control this. Not control YOU, of course. But that i can keep things compartmentalized, so that my “other” life remains more or less unaffected. i need to submit to You so badly. i have never stopped. So i tell myself, sure, i don’t have much money, and have a family to care for, but i can cut out those daily lattes and skip the handful of times each month that i go to a restaurant on my lunch break. And that will add up to a small but steady flow i can devote to Goddess Kyaa. i deserve nothing and i am beneath contempt, but could perhaps be allowed to serve You in this quiet and miserable fashion. It would mean so much to me. i can’t stop thinking about You, Goddess. I doubt i ever will.
Yours, kneeling forever,
As you can see this poor thing is simply struggling with balancing the daily life of a family man and his very real need to submit to me. I’m sure this feeling is familiar to many of my minions!
Now, of course I love financial domination. Draining bank accounts and raping wallets is my bread and butter. Knowing that there are fools around the world going into debt just for one more clip, one more webcam session or one more pair of worn panties, puts a smile on my face. I’m greedy and I actually enjoy knowing that some of you idiots ruin your lives because of your addiction.
That said, I don’t intend on destroying the lives of every male that falls under my spell. What good would that do me? It’s far more profitable for me to let you spend a little bit at a time, slowly draining you at a sustainable rate, so that over time I get the maximum amount out of you. If I made every pathetic male that I caught in my web spend themselves homeless on day one I wouldn’t have the steady stream of clip sales, gifts, tributes and session requests from all my dedicated minions from which I benefit immensely.
So if you are worried about serving me because you think you can’t afford it… you’re probably right. But if you budget, sacrifice a little, work a bit harder, you CAN and you WILL be able to at least buy a few clips here and there, send me tributes on my birthday and the holidays, even perhaps afford a webcam session occasionally.
Whether it’s $5 or $5,000, what matters is that you sacrifice for me.
Buy clips and send tribute: